Communication UNIT 2 - Listening on the Job

What’s Listening?

According to the International Listening Association-

Listening is the process of receiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken and/or non-verbal messages.

Levels of Listening

Based on the effectiveness of the listening process, three levels of listening have been identified.
Level 1 is that of Non-listening and is  the least desirable, followed by
Level 2 which is Passive Listening.
Level 3 is Active Listening, which is most desirable. Though we listen at all the three levels during the course of the day depending on our interest and situation, it is beneficial to move to Level 3 for maximum listening effectiveness.
Good managers and leaders spend more time listening at Level 3.

Level 1 – Non-Listening

Here, the listener may appear  to be listening but actually he is more occupied with his own thoughts. 

He is minimally aware of the speaker speaking. He is likely to appear detached and will be unresponsive and passive.
Not really listening to the speaker .Really just waiting for your turn to speak. Already decided what you are going to say.
Eg.
In a hurry, thinking about the next thing.
Collecting specific information.
You think you already know the answer

Level 2 – Passive Listening

Passive listening is more about hearing than actually listening.
The listener superficially hears the words but does not understand in depth what is being said.
He concentrates on the word content of the message rather than the feelings and emotions associated with the message.
He does not get much involved in the communication activity, and rather than contributing equally to the conversational exchange, he is merely spoken to.
Nodding but not really paying attention.
 Doing other things at the same time.
 Can’t replay back what the person said.
Eg.
You’re making the tea whilst talking to your friends/kids/parents.
Reading your email whilst talking

Level 3 – Active Listening

This is the most desirable form of listening wherein the active listener gives full attention to what is being said. The listener concentrates on what is being said and also motivates the speaker to speak, making it easier for the speaker to deliver the message.
An active listener not only comprehends the message better but is also in a better position to remember and recall the message. He not only pays attention to the word content but also concentrates on the emotional and non-verbal aspect of the message. In active listening, the listener is directly involved in the conversation. He provides feedback to the speaker and voices his opinions and arguments.

Characteristics of Active Listeners

1.Active listeners are willing to give the speaker a chance to develop his or her ideas.
2. Active listeners are open-minded about people who look or sound different from themselves.
3. Active listeners can follow several methods of organization—even poorly organized material will be listened to with some degree of tolerance.
4. Active listeners are likely to listen even more attentively when the material becomes difficult. It becomes a challenge to them.

Types of listening

Most people, most of the time, take listening for granted, it’s something that just happens.  It is only when you stop to think about listening and what it entails that you begin to realise that listening is in fact an important skill that needs to be nurtured and developed.
Listening is perhaps the most important of all interpersonal skills .
Effective listening is very often the foundation of strong relationships with others, at home, socially, in education and in the workplace.

Types of listening - Critical Listening

Critical listening is usually needed when we suspect that we may be listening to a biased source of information.
This involves not only comprehending the message but also evaluating and analyzing the message being received in light of one’s own background. It involves judging the acceptability of what is said depending on how logical one finds it to be.

 Critical listening is also associated with being able to detect propaganda devices employed by a communicator.In adjusting your critical listening, focus on the following guidelines:
• Keep an open mind.
• Avoid filtering out difficult messages.
• Recognize your own biases.
• Avoid uncritical listening when you need to make evaluations and judgments.
• Recognize and combat the normal tendency to sharpen.
• Analyze the audience and adapt the message to the listeners.

Types of listening - Empathic Listening

As the term suggests, the listener tries to demonstrate empathy for the speaker.
It can also be described as listening “between the lines”. When we listen between the lines we heighten our awareness and interpersonal sensitivity to the entire message a person may be trying to communicate.
Empathy is perception and communication by resonance, be identification, by experiencing in ourselves some reflection of the emotional tone that is being experienced by the other person.

• Empathic listening serves as a reward or encouragement to the speaker. 
• It communicates your caring and acceptance and reaffirms the person’s sense of worth. This style of listening seems to be most important in terms of strengthening or improving a positive interpersonal relationship between the parties involved.
• Empathic listening often requires the opposite frame of mind from that required for critical listening.
• Empathic listening implies a willingness not to judge, evaluate, or criticize but rather to be an accepting,permissive, and understanding listener.

Becoming an empathic requires focusing on the following guidelines:
• A greater emphasis on listening than on talking. • Responding to that which is personal rather than abstract.
• Following the other in his exploration rather than leading him into areas we think he should be exploring.
• Clarifying what the other person has said about his own thoughts and feelings rather than asking questions or telling him what we believe he should be thinking, seeing, or feeling.
• Responding to the feelings implicit in what the other has said rather than the assumptions or “content” that he has talked about.
• Trying to get into the other person’s inner frame of reference rather than listening and responding from our own frame of reference.
• The speaker is more apt to keep talking (vs. defending, blaming, shutting down, or withdrawing). This can build trust, intimacy, and relationships, over time.

Types of listening - Selective Listening

Listening is done only partly or selectively. It involves selecting the desired part of the message and ignoring the undesired part of the message. The attention of the listener is not focused and the listener keeps switching off and on.

Types of listening - Rapport Listening

When trying to build rapport with others we can engage in a type of listening that encourages the other person to trust and like us. A salesman, for example, may make an effort to listen carefully to what you are saying as a way to promote trust and potentially make a sale.  This type of listening is common in situations of negotiation.

Barriers to Effective Listening

The factors which act as impediments to effective listening and are considered as barriers to effective listening can be classified into the following:

1. PHYSICAL BARRIER:

Noise, poor acoustics, malfunctioning of the mechanical devices being used, frequent interruptions and uncomfortable seating arrangements are physical barriers that hamper effective listening. The first step of the listening process is hearing, and extraneous noise disturbs the hearing process.
Extraneous noise disturbs both the listener and the speaker. In case a device like a microphone or telephone is being used, then the malfunctioning of the device will act as a hurdle or it may also result in the failure of transmission of the message from the speaker to the listener. Poor acoustics of the room or uncomfortable seating arrangements may make it difficult for the listener to concentrate on the speaker.

Interruptions by other people or by the telephone while someone is speaking disturb the concentration of the listener, frustrate the speaker and make the listening process less effective. Message overload, which involves listening to a lot of information one after another, also makes it impossible to listen attentively after a certain point.
Thus, we can summarize the physical barriers to include:
  Noise
  Poor acoustics
  Defective mechanical devices
  Frequent interruptions
  Uncomfortable seating arrangements and environment
  Message overload

 People-related Barriers
Both the speaker and the listener influence the communication process. People-related barriers can be both physiological and psychological.
Physiological Barriers
1. State of Health - The physical condition of the individual affects the listening ability. Fever, pain or any other form of bodily discomfort makes it difficult for an individual to listen attentively. Similarly poor health conditions of a speaker reduce his ability to speak well and this in turn reduces the listening efficiency of the listener.
2. Disability
Hearing is the first step of the listening process and, therefore, hearing deficiencies may lead to poor listening. Similarly, speech disorders of the speaker may make speech incoherent to the listener. At times the speaker’s accent, though not a disability, may make it difficult for the listener to comprehend. Similarly, when a speaker speaks very rapidly, it may also result in an unclear message reaching the listener.
3. Wandering Attention
Research  shows  that the human  mind can process words at the rate of about 500 per minute, whereas a speaker speaks at the rate of about 150 words per minute. The difference between the two is quite large-350 words per minute. This leaves the listener with sufficient time to let his mind wander. The listener has to be careful of this rather than let his mind wander. Spending the time concentrating on the message and analyzing it would improve listening.

Psychological Barriers

Psychological barriers relate to attitudinal and behavioral aspects. These include the following:
Being Unsure of the Speaker’s Ability
Based on past experience or inputs from sources, the listener may have a preconceived notion of the speaker’s ability. He may perceive the speaker to not be well informed, or to be lacking in depth and ability. This acts as a barrier to the listening process as the listener will not listen to what the speaker has to say.

Personal Anxiety
Sometimes we are preoccupied with personal concerns and anxieties. This makes it difficult to perceive what is being said and thus acts as a barrier to effective listening.


Attitude
Many times the attitude of the listener acts as a barrier to effective listening. The listener may be highly egocentric with a ‘know it all attitude’ and may not listen because he feels that he already knows what the listener has to say. A casual attitude on the part of the listener towards listening, assuming it can be done without much concentration and effort, also acts as a barrier to listening.
An overly critical attitude of the listener may shift the focus of listening from what is being said to noticing faults and errors in accent, delivery, appearance of the speaker, grammar, and so on.
Impatience
The listener may not have the patience to wait for the other person to finish what he has to say. He may be intolerant or may be eager to add his own points to the discussion. As a result, his desire to speak overcomes his desire to listen, thus acting as a barrier.

Guidelines for effective listening

In today's high-tech, high-speed, high-stress world, communication is more important then ever, yet we seem to devote less and less time to really listening to one another. 

Genuine listening has become a rare gift—the gift of time. It helps build relationships, solve problems, ensure understanding, resolve conflicts, and improve accuracy. At work, effective listening means fewer errors and less wasted time.
At home, it helps develop resourceful, self-reliant kids who can solve their own problems. Listening builds friendships and careers.

Step 1: Face the speaker and maintain eye contact.

Talking to someone while they scan the room, study a computer screen, or gaze out the window is like trying to hit a moving target. How much of the person's divided attention you are actually getting? Fifty percent? Five percent?
Eye contact is considered a basic ingredient of effective communication. When we talk, we look each other in the eye. That doesn't mean that you can't carry on a conversation from across the room, or from another room, but if the conversation continues for any length of time, you (or the other person) will get up and move. The desire for better communication pulls you together.
Step 1: Face the speaker and maintain eye contact.
Do your conversational partners the courtesy of turning to face them. Put aside papers, books, the phone and other distractions. Look at them, even if they don't look at you.
Shyness, uncertainty, shame, guilt, or other emotions, along with cultural taboos, can inhibit eye contact in some people under some circumstances. Excuse the other guy, but stay focused yourself.

Step 2: Be attentive, but relaxed.

Now that you've made eye contact, relax. You don't have to stare fixedly at the other person. You can look away now and then and carry on like a normal person. The important thing is to be attentive. The dictionary says that to "attend" another person means to:

• be present
• give attention
• apply or direct yourself
• pay attention
• remain ready to serve

Mentally screen out distractions, like background activity and noise. In addition, try not to focus on the speaker's accent or speech mannerisms to the point where they become distractions. Finally, don't be distracted by your own thoughts, feelings, or biases.

Step 3: Keep an open mind.

Listen without judging the other person or mentally criticizing the things she tells you. If what she says alarms you, go ahead and feel alarmed, but don't say to yourself, "Well, that was a stupid move." As soon as you indulge in judgmental bemusements, you've compromised your effectiveness as a listener.
Listen without jumping to conclusions. Remember that the speaker is using language to represent the thoughts and feelings inside her brain. You don't know what those thoughts and feelings are and the only way you'll find out is by listening.
Don't be a sentence-grabber. Some people can't slow their mental pace enough to listen effectively, so they try to speed up the speaker’s by interrupting and finishing their sentences

Step 4: Listen to the words and try to picture what the speaker is saying.

Allow your mind to create a mental model of the information being communicated. Whether a literal picture, or an arrangement of abstract concepts, your brain will do the necessary work if you stay focused, with senses fully alert. When listening for long stretches, concentrate on, and remember, key words and phrases.
When it's your turn to listen, don’t spend the time planning what to say next. You can't rehearse and listen at the same time. Think only about what the other person is saying.
Finally, concentrate on what is being said, even if it bores you. If your thoughts start to wander, immediately force yourself to refocus.

Step 5: Don't interrupt and don't impose your "solutions."

Children used to be taught that it's rude to interrupt. I'm not sure that message is getting across anymore. Certainly the opposite is being modeled on the majority of talk shows and reality programs, where loud, aggressive, in-your-face behavior is condoned, if not encouraged.
Interrupting sends a variety of messages. It says:

• "I'm more important than you are."
• "What I have to say is more interesting, accurate or relevant."
• "I don't really care what you think."
• "I don't have time for your opinion."
• "This isn't a conversation, it's a contest, and I'm going to win."

We all think and speak at different rates. If you are a quick thinker and an agile talker, the burden is on you to relax your pace for the slower, more thoughtful communicator—or for the guy who has trouble expressing himself.

When listening to someone talk about a problem, refrain from suggesting solutions. Most of us don't want your advice anyway. If we do, we'll ask for it. Most of us prefer to figure out our own solutions. We need you to listen and help us do that. Somewhere way down the line, if you are absolutely bursting with a brilliant solution, at least get the speaker's permission. Ask, "Would you like to hear my ideas?"

Step 6: Wait for the speaker to pause to ask clarifying questions.

When you don't understand something, of course you should ask the speaker to explain it to you. But rather than interrupt, wait until the speaker pauses. Then politely excuse yourself and say like, "Back up a second. I didn't understand what you just said about…"

Step 7: Ask questions only to ensure understanding.

At lunch, a colleague is excitedly telling you about her a deal that she struck with a client. In the course of this, she mentions that she that a mutual friend works at the clients office. You jump in with, "Oh, I haven't heard from her in ages. How is she?" and, just like that, discussion shifts to her divorce, and the poor kids, which leads to a comparison of custody laws, and before you know it an hour is gone and the deal is a distant memory.
This particular conversational affront happens all the time. Our questions lead people in directions that have nothing to do with where they thought they were going. Sometimes we work our way back to the original topic, but very often we don't.
When you notice that your question has led the speaker astray, take responsibility for getting the conversation back on track.

Step 8: Try to feel what the speaker is feeling.

If you feel sad when the person with whom you are talking expresses sadness, joyful when she expresses joy, fearful when she describes her fears—and convey those feelings through your facial expressions and words—then your effectiveness as a listener is assured. Empathy is the heart and soul of good listening.
To experience empathy, you have to put yourself in the other person's place and allow yourself to feel what it is like to be her at that moment. This is not an easy thing to do. It takes energy and concentration. But it is a generous and helpful thing to do, and it facilitates communication like nothing else does.

Step 9: Give the speaker regular feedback.

Show that you understand where the speaker is coming from by reflecting the speaker's feelings. "You must be thrilled!" "What a terrible ordeal for you." "I can see that you are confused." If the speaker's feelings are hidden or unclear, then occasionally paraphrase the content of the message. Or just nod and show your understanding through appropriate facial expressions and an occasional well-timed "hmmm" or "uh huh.“

Step 10: Pay attention to what isn't said—to nonverbal cues.

Face to face with a person, you can detect enthusiasm, boredom, or irritation very quickly in the expression around the eyes, the set of the mouth, the slope of the shoulders. These are clues you can't ignore. When listening, remember that words convey only a fraction of the message.

NOTETAKING

Effective notetaking involves extracting and recording the important ideas covered in lecture in a way that will help you to recall them.
Good notes provide a valuable means for review and learning, and can increase the probability of doing well on an exam.

SUGGESTIONS TO IMPROVE YOUR NOTETAKING

1. Think before writing. Relate what is being said to what you already
know or have reviewed. Use your own interests/needs as well as
information common to the course to guide your thoughts.
2. Preparing for class is an aid in helping you to become aware of the
major concepts and in deciding what to record.
3. Be selective. Listen to everything, but do not try to write it all down.
Search for the main ideas and sort out the important sub points and
details. Notes should be brief, legible and consistent.
4. Take accurate notes. Use our own words, but don’t waste time thinking
of synonyms. Lecturer’s terms may be simplified later. Use brackets to
separate your own ideas from those of the lecturer.
5. Abbreviate words whenever possible, but be consistent.
6. Don’t worry about missing a point. Leave spaces and fill what you missed later. Also, leave spaces for expanding and clarifying notes.
7. Record all important facts: dates, names, places, formulas. Copy diagrams and illustrations which will clarify your notes.
8. Draw a single line through mistakes, rather than erase or black out completely. This saves time and energy, and you may find later that the mistakes may have been important to record after all.
9. Integrate lecture notes with text material. This is helpful for clarification and retention of material. If text material is repeated in the lecture, you can make a notation for later referral to the text. Be sure to note supplementary examples or elaborations.
10. Review notes after class. Reread and edit your notes as soon as
possible while the information is still fresh in your mind, adding and
clarifying in order to increase your understanding. Write a summary (a
paragraph or two) or formulate a summary question at the end of your
notes to consolidate ideas and to reflect the relationship of facts and
ideas with each other and as a whole.